Getting to ‘no’ you: Tips from a hostage negotiator

Mediation Circus

By Michael R. Panter

Hon. Michael R. Panter (Ret.) is a senior mediator at ADR Systems of America LLC. He previously served in the Law, Family and Municipal Divisions of the Cook County Circuit Court. He was a trial lawyer for 30 years. Share responses and comments at mikepanter.com.

Posted March 13, 2019 11:24 AM

In my journey to learn about mediation, I thought Roger Fisher and William Ury’s “Getting to Yes” was gospel — until I happened to read Chris Voss’ “Never Split the Difference: Negotiating as if Your Life Depended on It.”Voss was a top-level hostage negotiator who dealt with every manner of bad guy. In his cases, there were no win-win situations, and he couldn’t exactly agree to split the difference and let the terrorist kill two of four hostages.He boasts of humiliating the …

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